What's new? Well I guess I haven't spoken about my new car yet. I was at the point where I didn't care what car I got anymore, as long as I didn't have to drive mine that I had for 4 years and was slowly but surely dying on me. My brother-in-laws brother rebuilds and sells cars for what I think are pretty good deals. He had one that I figured I'd go ahead and get, but of course my dad said no. I hadn't saved for a car so I needed to borrow money from my parents, and although it always pissed me off when he'd say no to a car I wanted, I had to respect his decision at the same time. My dad ended up finding the same car on craigslist a couple hours later, it was newer, had Way less miles on it, and was 2k above my budget. Although doing anything over my budget pains me, I admit it was a pretty good deal so I got it. I'm still getting used to the little things, one thing I don't like at all is even though it has good gas mileage and only costs me $25 to fill up, it has a small tank so I have to fill up twice as often as I did before. It's really annoying and it's terrible when the nearest gas station is another 20 miles and you dont know if you'll make it. I also have to pay my dad back and it could take me up to a year which is in such a long time, I want it to go by so quickly and painlessly.
You know what I don't understand, is when a guy tells me he wants nothing more but to be with me...than leaves me not long after? I feel like it's completely twisted as in they ought to say they want nothing more but to be with me After seeing each other for at least a month. It seems like in my situations it's always the opposite. The majority of guys I've dated ended up leaving me in the end (I only left 1 guy), for various reasons that have nothing to do with there being anything wrong with me. I feel as though there is something wrong with me that they don't want to say to avoid hurting my feelings, but it hurts more when I don't know the truth. People always ask how I don't have a boyfriend because supposably I'm so awesome, and my only response is "I really don't know." Being friendzoned sucks, but everything happens for a reason. It's weird being alone, I haven't been alone in so long. It's something I ought to get used to though, perhaps I'll go without anyone for over a year. I've also decided to take a different approach on dating, one that doesn't necessarily envolve men at all.
I really want to take a short roadtrip in my car before Oregon decides to do nothing more but to piss on us for many months ahead. I honestly do not miss the rain at all, and I don't love heat either but my biggest thing are dry roads. Driving in the rain is something one will never get used to.
I hope I eventually stop overthinking things, and not taking everything way too personal.