Names Alesa.22.I speak my mind,therefore there are no boundaries.I am a distraught child,so I might offend you unknowingly.At the same time,I am very caring when I should not be.Cheers.

5.7.15

You need to make friends

So, I went to church as usual even though I was sunburnt like crazy and every move was torture, but I really wanted to sing some awesome worship songs. Just like any typical Sunday at church, I walk in without talking to anyone cause I hardly know anyone, sit at my usual spot in the front middle and fiddle around on my phone until service begins. This time though was a bit different because the pastors wife approached me while I was sitting and asked if I had any friends at church. I sat silently for a moment and quietly said "No". She said she notices that all I do is come and go without stopping to say Hi or conversing with anyone, and she understands that I may just be coming to have alone time with Jesus but it's been 6 years and I don't really know anyone. I'm surprised of how many people actually know of me and even know my name when I don't know them. She was right, but little does she know that I've tried but failed.
I'm utterly shy when it comes to meeting new people even within my own church and I have tried, but clearly I'm still alone. Russians aren't easy to make friends with even if you've seen them a billion times, you only become friends if you have a family there or grew up together since childhood, not when you're in your late teens/early 20's all by yourself. I've opened doors for people at church and the women would never thank me for it. I've said Hello to people who would say Hi back than turn around and continue chit chatting with their own group of friends. Truth is I'm not meant to be friends with anyone at my own church because it seems like I'm not compatible with anyone which is fine, I'm far used to being alone my whole life as it is.
Don't get me wrong, I WISH I had friends at church. I wish I could come and hug people every Sunday. I wish I had a husband to come to church with. I wish I was super happy seeing everyone...but that's a mere wish that will less likely ever be fulfilled. For now it is just me and Jesus, and for now that is all it will be.
Truth hurts

28.6.15

I just want...

I just want to hold your hand, even when you are drunk.
I just want to kiss you, even when you tell me to f*ck off. 
I just want to cuddle with you, even when you easily get mad.
I just want to stroke my hand through your hair, even when you are high.
I just want to go on trips together, as jealous as you are.
I just want to tell the world about you, even when you easily get annoyed.
I just want to be with you, as much as you know that you're not for me.
You left me because you did not want to change the horrible person your ex made you.
You left me because mentally you are too young for me.
You left me because you are weak and I am strong...
Yet, I still want to be with you because of the abundant amount of Hope I have and because I know the loving and caring person you once were still lurks inside your heart. It's only a matter of time that all that you are and all that you do now will soon be a thing of the past. 
I know this because I've prayed everyday for you and your health. 
Although you may not be religious, I know God has never given up on me when I'm in my lowest state so I know he won't give up on you either.

19.6.15

Permanent State Job

So, after applying to nearly 30 State jobs since last October when I began as a temp for the Oregon Health Authority with 5 interviews (and more to come), I finally landed myself a permanent job. What’s funny is that it’s completely opposite from what I do, but I am excited at the fact that it deals with Transportation which is what my original field of study is.
Currently I’m a limited duration Human Services Specialist 2 Lead for the Oregon Health Authority, which has been more or less a nightmare. I figured this would have been a great opportunity when my original managers offered it to me but it only took me a few days to realize it wasn’t for me. Helping out a staff of 140 to process applications that I learned to do in a week when I was a temp, but has been taking them weeks-months to learn for no apparent reason. I felt so out of place being 22 and teaching people double my age how to do their job, and then later on down the road people began to complain about my personality and all this nonsense that I’ve never had to deal with in the 4 years I’ve been working. Although I’m very good at hiding my stress and outside problems at work, I truly felt as though I started to show it without realizing it. I had become impatient, stressed, confused, and lost trust in everyone I tried so hard to teach how to do a simple procedure.  I was very thankful for having my current job and simply having any job, but it was definitely taking a toll on me that wasn’t something I should or ought to be handling. I had fought hard to go back to where I originally came from because as a lead, I did not feel as though it was benefiting me at all because I never plan on being a manager. I had the option to step down as a lead but my original managers kept brushing my request off, as if I really didn’t have a choice. Quitting wasn’t an option either because I had moved out and needed the money and I am getting paid fairly well for a 22 year old!
As I began to get interview after interview, I gained a little hope that perhaps soon I’d get to leave my job and move forward to something new where I got to work independently and have my own cubicle. I quickly lost that hope after speaking to some of my workers about state interviews and some had gone to over 20 interviews and got nothing besides the temp job they have now. I had 7 interviews lined up, 6 of them being related to Human Services Specialist for DHS and 1 of them as an Office Specialist for the DMV Headquarters. To be honest I did not want to work for DHS but my experience was closely related to what they do. Surprisingly I did not get a job with any of the first 3 interviews I had with DHS. The 4th interview I had was at the DMV Headquarters and I felt like it went pretty well, and they had invited me back for the second round which consisted of a long skills test. At that point I thought I for sure wouldn’t get the job because I completely botched the test. A few days later I went on my 5th interview with DHS and at that point I just didn’t care if I got the job or not, I just went through with the interview and hung out for a bit before going back to work. A day later I got a call from the DMV Headquarters, offering me the job. I couldn’t believe it, I was literally jumping up and down when they told me. It was just so bizarre that the place I least likely expected to be at but was really hoping I’d get, I ended being at. Although my relationship with God has been on and off, I truly feel like this was something He had done. The best part is I’ll be getting paid the same, won’t have to have any human interaction or manage any team, get to work independently (once I’m completely trained), and I get my own high wall cubicle. I am so stoked! The only downside is having to drive about 8 minutes to work which is nothing but it was nice to walk two blocks to work. I begin the first of July and I simply cannot wait to move on to something completely new.

6.6.15

Departure from a Dream

So, I went to my last drill ever. Of course I have a billion feelings and thoughts going through my mind about whether or not I did the right thing to submit my letter of voluntary separation from the guard. I knew for a fact I was going to cry and I held it together really well until I had to talk to one of the lieutenants. He was the one who did my "swearing in" speech in front of an F-15, and now he's signing my paper for my separation so it hurt to see him have to go through that along with myself. He had me explain everything as to why I didn't want to be there anymore and although it had to do a lot with the poor timing of being sent to basic and tech school, I became fearful of simply being a part of this organization. Not only that, but seeing what they'll be doing in Eastern Europe alongside Ukraine. With I think about my family in Ukraine, I always cry because of all the struggle they have been going through with the war. So when I explained that, that'd when the tears started rolling. "Unfortunately, that is the reality of our job" he said so now that I've seen the reality of being in the military, I just wanted out. It's surprising how many friends and family have been supportive of me resigning over going through with it, it honestly makes me sad a bit.
I just can't help but wounder WHY God does what He does. I fought so hard to accomplish my dreams and goals of being in aviation and traveling the world, but I'm not going anywhere and all the opportunities I took just went down the drain as if it were never meant to be in the first place. Am I not deserving of living my dream as a pilot? Am I meant to be trapped in this crap town and live single for the rest of my life? I will never understand. For now, I shall mourn my departure from reality and continue living this life the way I never intended for it to be. Than again, these aren't my decisions, but the man above.

24.5.15

Wisdom

So, because I recently got dual medical insurances I figured why not get all my wisdom teeth pulled even though they never bothered me nor were they ever grown out. I thought I would just take advantage of my health insurances because although the procedure cost $2500, I didn't have to pay a single penny! A lot of people were telling me horror stories about them bleeding a lot and feeling their stitches come apart but fortunately I didn't have that experience at all. My cheeks are really swollen but that's about it. The only embarrassing thing that happened was when my parents picked me up and took me to their place, and I began to cry because I couldn't help but think how cute my sisters dog was. My sister started laughing her ass off which caused me to cry even more because I was so embarrassed at how loopy the anesthesia was making me as it was fading off. I really miss eating proper food that isn't soup or mashed potatoes though. I'm sure I can chew hard food but I really don't want to risk my stitches coming apart or getting any food caught in the cuts that were made. The best part of it all of course is the vicodin, which really sucks compared to oxycodon but it still helps me fall asleep. The only problem with it though is that it makes me really sad. I begin to question and doubt my relationship, I being to wonder who my real friends are if any, and just all this upsetting stuff. I was sad that no one wanted to keep me company or take care of me (except my parents who don't count). When I have a friend who has had surgery or anything, I'm the first to offer food and care...but no one does for me. It makes it a lot harder that I live on my own too, I would just go sit under the sun at the park and feed the squirrels as if they're the only things that want to be with me cause I have something for them.
Well this post just went downhill quickly.

13.5.15

Interviews, Obama, and Sisters

So, I hate not blogging for a long time because so much stuff goes on that I later forget about to share! I'll just start off by my first permanent state job interviews I finally got after applying to a billion state jobs. The only downside is that their both in the Portland area, and I had completely forgot that I even applied for them because it was a long time ago. The crazy part was I called to two interviews within a day! One is for an HSS1 position and the other is an HSS3 position (I'm currently an HSS2). Sure you might be thinking "Well an HSS1 is essentially a downgrade from what you are now?", true but it's all about being permanent rather than a temp or limited duration employee. The HSS1 is a two part interview, and after going to the first part I knew for sure I wouldn't get called back because it was a skills test and I completely botched it. To my surprise though, a couple days later they called me back for a one on one interview! I have yet to go to that but I did go to my HSS3 interview which is just a one part interview where you actually get to talk about your experience. Pretty sure I did really bad in that one too but again, I'm not worried about getting either of these jobs because I'm honestly unprepared as to whether I'd have to move or commute everyday to work in Portland.
Obama was coming to Portland and I had to see it, and being in the air guard I was allowed to come over to our base and watch him fly in! Although he did land on our side of the airport, he was still at a far distance to where I couldn't really see him through the window (we got locked inside until he completely left the airport). We have a big zoom in camera though so we were zooming in on the plane and watched him get out that way. The fact that he was yards away was still thrilling, and the best part was seeing Air Force 1 land. After he had drove off the airport, my friend who's the Airfield Supervisor for PDX, picked me up and we drove closed to Air Force 1 to get some really cool pictures. It was absolutely amazing! We also gave a ride for one of the white house reps to Air Force 2 which landed later, and me and him talked about what he did and what he does outside of working at the pentagon and stuff. He also gave me his business card which is so cool! I'll definitely always remember that.
As for my relationship, it has been quite the rollercoaster ride but my mate really made it up to me. He invited me to go to Sisters, OR with him because they were having their lacrosse tournaments there in which he coaches. I love central Oregon and I hardly get to go there so I was excited to go. What made it more exciting was the fact that he surprised me by getting a condo at Black Butte Ranch which is a beautiful resort where you can see Sisters (the mountains) at a short distance. The condo itself was really nice too, with a big ol' kitchen and a fireplace. He kept that a secret from me though so I came completely unprepared, thinking I was just going to be lounging in a hotel room all day. I still managed with all I had, and we went grocery shopping and made dinner at the condo. It was so good. I think the biggest thing about the whole trip was the fact that he has expressed how he felt towards me which never happens. It really reassured me that he really did care about me, and that we want to make this work a lot longer. I don't have all the control as to whether a relationship will work out or not, but I'm keeping my hopes up on this one.

18.4.15

Second thoughts on Military...and Life in general

So, life has rather been crazy right now both good and bad. Last weekend I had drill (I've already lost count on how many times I've been). This time I got to do the physical fitness mock test that they do at basic and I admit I was pretty nervous because I knew I'd do rather bad which was exactly the case. The minimum push ups for girls is 27...I did 10
The minimum sit ups for girls is 34...I did 16
The minimum time for a 1.5mile run is 14:21...I did 14:11.
As you can see, I have no upper body strength what so ever and I never had growing up, cardio was always my thing and still my preferred thing but in a place like this, you have to excel in both. What was more disappointing is my supervisor finding out, because you can't go to basic training if you can't pass a simple mock test. I was sore for days after that because I hadn't worked out much at all prior to that so it was a big shock to my body. I decided I'd start doing 10 push ups and sit ups in the morning and night, as well as run 1.5 miles after work. The biggest thing about being in the guard for me right now is I'm having second thoughts about it all. I recently found out that I can leave at any moment without it ever being 'dishonorable discharge', because you're not actually chained down until you swear in the day you ship out for basic which isn't until August for me. This was really big news to me because recruiters never tell anyone this, but it's a real thing. I had told one of my squadron mates about having second thoughts, because they'll be shipping me out during the time my limited duration job will be ending and I may miss an opportunity for a permanent job which I can't afford to miss. Not only that but they'll be shipping me out twice because I'm one in a million who doesn't get to go to school right after basic because there's not school date available for me until next Summer. The times they'll be sending me off is so inconvenient, and it really annoys me because I was suppose to already done with ALL of it but because the person in charge of scheduling us basic/school dates is taking their precious time, I have to suffer through the wait. I can't imagine if I did just walk up and quit though, how disappointed everyone there would be along with myself...but there are other things more important to me like my 'civilian' job and my family. So this is a big decision I have to make real soon.
I've sort of became addicted to yoga and the simple lifestyle of it. I don't do any hardcore yoga cause I am not flexible what so ever, but more of the kind that focuses on breathing and staying relaxed all while stretching. It's truly helped me a lot, and it's really made me want to go to a yoga retreat which is definitely on my bucket list right now! And again, I don't do that type of yoga that prays to Buddha or whatever else you may think (those aren't actually common around here). I have been having a hard time keeping up with my relationship with Jesus which is really sad and hard to admit, but it's the truth. I still go to church but I've somehow had a hard time taking what I learn into my own life and being that perfect child of God. I just feel so disconnected and it's been hard to get back to being %100 in it again, but I know I will be because I will never give up on that big aspect of my life.
Work has been taking up %75 of my week which is a lot and it has been rather stressful, but I don't have those thought of giving up anymore which is nice. Although if I were asked to go back to where I originally was, I'd still go in a heartbeat.
When I used to live with my parents, all my friends always wanted to go out and hang out but now that I've moved out, No one has asked me to hang out or asked to come over. It's quite bizarre really because I thought everyone would bug me to come over but it's almost sad that no one doesn't. It's alright though, gives me plenty of time to nap or do my own thing I guess.
Other than that, idk.

28.3.15

Momentary Freedom

So, the moment we've all been waiting for...I had finally moved out on my own. These past 3 years, all I wanted was to move out because of how difficult it was being home with my parents. Though I kept making it a new years resolution to save up and move out, it simply wasn't happening. Not knowing when I was going to boot camp this year either, I wasn't sure whether it would have even been worth moving out. When I found out when I'd be shipped to basic training though I figured it wasn't too little time to enjoy these last few precious months without my parents. I didn't have much saved at all in my bank account, but I spent every last penny to settle in the most adorable studio apartment in downtown Salem just 2 blocks away from work. It's still very bare considering I'm waiting until payday to be able to buy furniture so for now I only have a new bed and a decorated bathroom. My kitchen is also pretty substantial but could still have a lot more things. Overall, I love my place. I love to finally be alone. I love that I can decorate it all as I want. I love that I can come home during lunch from work to take a power nap in my cozy bed. I love to not have to call my parents telling them where I'm at in the middle of the night. I love the freedom of being out late. I love that all my favourite places in downtown are a walking distance away. I love it all. It's sad that it's only for 4 months before I leave to basic, but it makes me enjoy every minute of it.
Now, you most likely be wondering how my parents took it and that's where the crazy part comes in. I was notified on a Friday that I got approved for my apartment and I said I wanted to move in the day after tomorrow. I was going to tell my parents the night I got approved, but we were having a party at our house so I didn't want to spill the beans in the middle of it. I was going to tell them the next day, but then they went out to a party and I didn't feel like calling them to tell them the news was going to be appropriate. The day of me moving out came and I had to get there in the morning to sign papers and such, and move all my stuff in. My heart was aching, I was already moving my stuff in my apartment and my parents still didn't know. I was so afraid to tell them at that point because it was now a last minute thing which I'm well known for. I came home and told my dad...he asked why and how much I was paying and that's it. Then my mum came home and I knew my dad was going to tell her first, so I was kind of shaking when I walked into the kitchen. She asked the same thing, why and how much I'm paying...and that was it. I gently asked if I was able to borrow some pots and pans (same ones I took to Crater Lake), and she began gathering not only that but a whole bunch of others things. She was helping me move! And I didn't get yelled at! This came as a big shocker, because lets face it, my parents are traditional communist who only want their children to move out when they get married. But I'm 22 now, and there's no way I'm getting married anytime soon so I've given up on that idea. I've given up a lot on traditional slavic things, like A Lot.
I got promoted to be a limited duration lead worker for all the new temps we hired and so far it's the biggest mistake of my life. It's extremely difficult and I've already cried once and am pretty sure I will again soon. I figured it'd be hard but not that hard and the crappy part is I cannot quit because I make good money and obviously now I have an apartment to pay for. It's definitely the perfect definition of no matter how much money you make, work somewhere that will make you happy rather than sad all the time. It's more difficult when all the new temps have become comfortable with me and like me, but now they always feel bad for me because I'm always completely drained and just not happy to be there and it's not entirely their fault. I hope it'll get better soon though.
I also dyed my hair blonde and my boyfriend loves it along with many others, and I like it too But I can't imagine how much I'm gonna be spending all together to maintain it with always dying the roots since my hair grows extremely fast. It already looks bad with it all grown out but I don't always have $80 laying around to get touch ups. Hopefully I'll get to dye it back to black eventually.
I've also been going to yoga 4 days a week and absolutely love it!
Life is simply bittersweet at the moment.

16.3.15

Promotion or Mistake

So, just an update on this 'crazy' life of mine. My temporary contract working for the State was almost over and fortunately they were hiring tons of Limited Duration employees which we were all qualified for. Of course I applied and had an interview, and everyone were getting calls for the job offer except me...The one call I got was by accident by one of the HR guys who was working on my application. In the voicemail he mentioned something about my references but told me to disregard the phone call. Days went by and I wasn't hearing anything while everyone else was excited to get the limited duration position. I decided to call HR and hunt down the guy who was working on my application to see what the hold up was. He said he got a hold of 2 references (which is what they need), but one of them couldn't give enough information about me due to their company policy so they need one more reference. This was on a Friday and I was hurrying to get a hold of any of my past managers to have me use them as a reference, but none of them got back to me by the time the HR office closed! So I had to eagerly wait until Monday to e-mail the HR guy some more references and wait once again. I was praying the Whole time, asking God for this position. A couple days later I got an e-mail stating I passed the background check (which meant they went through with my references fine), and than a couple days after my managers had finally offered me the job. I was thrilled to know I'd be getting to stay with all my co-workers in my lovely spot, continuing on this journey of working on applications, eating pretzels, and snuggling in my blanket at work. Than the managers called me into their office again a few days later, giving me another offer. They asked if I wanted to be a Lead worker in one of the new buildings they were opening up. This was a Big Deal, a Huge Opportunity, that I Almost didn't take because of the simple fact of leaving my co-workers and comfortable office life....but I agreed to the offer. There were 5 (out of 80ish) others who got this offer as well, and when they announced our promotion, there were a lot of mixed feelings in the room. It pained me to see how sad people were to not have received this offer, and I was honestly shocked that they even chose me.
Today was my first day as a Lead to the whole new group of temps that got hired (+120). It was extremely overwhelming, from sitting for months to running around in a single day was exhausting even though it shouldn't be. Going to these leadership team meetings and trying to figure things out together, it was a whole new experience for me. Every time I was put to do a new project at work, I always had a hard time at first but grew to enjoy it quickly. But this project is a whole new ball game I am utterly nervous about. I just keep thinking of how I miss being at my office spot, messing around with my co-workers, reading my book when the systems would go down. Now it's just work work run run work more. I'm pretty sure it'll be another one of those things where I'll grow to enjoy it, but for now, the struggle is real. I guess God gave me more than I bargained for and I'm so thankful for it, but I hope this won't literally kill me.
There's not much else going on in life, it's really just been work that's taking over every hour of it. I'm hoping to move into a cute studio apartment right next to my work, but it's still in the process. I'm extremely sad I don't get to work with my chunky monkey anymore, it makes the days so much harder because of how much I got used to seeing him everyday and now it'd only be for 30min if not at all. He was my biggest motivator while at work, and now I need it more than ever with this new position but now I'm on my own with it. I just hope I make it out alive.

10.3.15

4th Drill



So, drill #4. It’s bizarre how at first the month would go by so slow until drill (which was so fun at first) but now drill comes so fast and it’s become tougher which is expected. The first day, us student flight kids took a tour of the fire station on base and spoke to one of the fire fighters about their job and what they do on daily basis. Their fire trucks are so cool! They look like transformers because they have to be capable of putting down airplane fires. I also had to sit through a very long newcomer’s presentation where all the top notch people came in to introduce themselves and talk about what they do. It was really helpful besides the fact that I was freezing and I was literally starving to death. After lunch we had physical training which sucked because I forgot my running shoes so I had to sit out of the training, but that was sort of a good thing too. After that I just went to my hotel, ordered and chowed down pizza, lounged around and was as lazy as could be.
The next day I dressed pretty nice which was a bad idea because though Sundays is when we learn new things in our shop, someone asked all the student flight kids in our unit to help with inventory which consisted of unpacking large travel bags to check if all the items are in there. My tights tore, my skirt and shirt were all sorts of dirty, and my hands were all scratched up, but I sort of missed working stock back in the day so it was alright. I went back to my shop and studied a book about all the markings and signs on the airfield. I learned a lot! We drove out on the airfield too and this time I was able to point out what meant what, it felt good to learn and know something new. Most of our crew was in Hawaii for a work trip so the place was pretty empty and there wasn’t much to do. We ended up getting to go home early which was nice since it was so sunny out, but I didn’t even get to enjoy it much because of all the allergies I was getting.
I did get some news though; I had finally received my dates on when I was going to drill…August 4th! It’s still a few months but I can’t believe it’s going to happen. The unusual part is that now, they Have to have you go to tech school right after drill, but they don’t know when I’ll be going to school still and that it’s possible I’ll be coming back home after basic training. The only reason they’re making me do that is because by the time I’d get my school date, I’ll be past my enlistment date meaning if I don’t go anywhere before November, I’d have to re-enlist which they don’t want anyone having to do.
Also, I finally dyed my hair white/blonde. I have mixed feelings about it.

5.3.15

22nd Birthday

So, the time had arrived once again where I celebrate the day of my birth...being February 28th. Because birthdays get over rated as the years go by, I sort of got in the tradition of just taking a trip somewhere far (though Portland last year wasn't far at all). The first place I had in mind was Palm Springs, then Vegas, then San Diego, then San Francisco, then somewhere on the coast, then Seattle, and then my last resort would be Portland again. I found a bomb deal in Vegas where a roundtrip flight & a 3 night stay would have only costed me $300! I was pretty set on this trip and told my dad I was going. His response, "It is cheap like that, but you have to realize how expensive it is to simply be there. I  don't think you should go and instead put the money towards your next car." I was really heartbroken, it was like being told that the day of my birth was unimportant but instead a new car that I won't get for years is more important. I told my boyfriend about the trip and what my dad had said...and he agreed with him!!!? After that I ended up just canceling the trip. It was already getting close to my birthday which meant any flight or hotel was going to be triple the price than it was a lot earlier, pretty much everything besides Portland was over my budget at that point. I didn't lose all hope though, as my birthday was getting closer I saw this amazing deal on Groupon for a Hilton hotel in downtown Seattle! It was $300 for 3 nights, which was how much my whole damn transportation and lodging amount was for Vegas but that quickly went down the drain. For the location and it being a weekend, this was the best deal I was going to get compared to anywhere else. So off to Seattle I went!
The first day, I got there in the evening so I got settled in and walked on over to the Cheesecake Factory for some yummy dinner. Then I went to the grocery store to get some snacks and walked back to the hotel in the dark rainy Seattle night. I loved every minute of it, I'm such a city girl and being able to get anything you need at a walking distance is my absolute favourite. 
The next day I went to the Flight Museum which was seriously the bomb!!! It's so much bigger compared to the Evergreen Aviation Museum, and you got to go up in real big airlines including one of the presidents old Air Force 1 plane. They also have this flight simulator where you got to pretend that you were in a fighter jet shooting planes and it went upside down and everything! It was so awesome, I loved all the airplanes. Afterwards I went to the Pike Place Market which was closing but I made it in time for some Piroshky Piroshky which were yummy as always! Then I walked to the Seattle ferris wheel that I'd never been on, it was so neat but I got really scared when it stopped when I was on the very top. 
I had bought brand new flats that would match all my outfits so I wouldn't have to bring so many shoes with me, but they became the most painful things to ever walk in. They bruised my feet so bad and I had to suffer with it for the rest of the trip. I don't know why I didn't buy a different pair while I was there, probably cause I hate sales tax that much. It was Friday night but I still went to bed early cause I was so dang tired!
Then Saturday rolled in, the day of my birthday. It wasn't hitting me at all that I was now 22 and I wasn't sure why, but I later realized it was because I hadn't recieved any gifts (not until I got home the day after to find a gift from my sister). I feel like gifts make you really realize where you're at in life and what exactly the occasion is, but there's wasn't much of that. No candles to blow out either. It was a chill day, starting off with the best belgian waffles in town. Then I went up on the highest building in Seattle, the Columbia tower, to do some awesome sight seeing of the whole area. Then I took a really good nap and explored the pike place area a bit more and some of the docks. After, I went to eat out at the Space Needle (SkyCity Restaurant) which I hadn't been to for 11 years. It was just as good as when I was 11 years old, with the beautiful city lights and scrumptious food. It was a beautiful night.
Sunday I got up and was off back home to hick town Salem. It's always funny going through Portland after, it's so tiny compared to Seattle! But you can never go wrong with the hipster vibe.
Overall I had a really good time in Seattle even though it wasn't my first choice, I was still happy to get away for the weekend with my chunky monkey and not have a care in the world.

15.2.15

Valentines 2015

So, that holiday finally arrived where all the single people weep about being alone and married to Netflix or something retarded. I for one had booked two tickets for a super romantic Valentines dinner on the Portland Spirit for me and my date because I was not gonna be lame like everyone else not making the most of this day where you recognize and show the love you have for others. Sure it's something we ought to do everyday, but the busy lives many people live, you sometimes forget to do that so this holiday is a good reminder for everyone to do just that. I originally planned to just go up for the dinner cruise and that's it, but my buddy wanted to spend the night there and really wanted to spend every minute he could with me and so that's just what we did. I first arrived to his place so that we would carpool and as I opened the passenger door to his car, I saw a red card with my name on it, chocolate, candy, rose pedals all over the seat, and a bouquet of roses. I was at the urge of tears, I absolutely loved it! We got to our hotel and had roughly 3 hours to kill so we were trying to figure out what to do and so we ended up playing Clue which I never have before. I've never really been a fan of board games but I know a lot of couples who are hardcore board game fanatics. We had a blast, I love how we're so competitive at games it's hilarious! It was almost time to go so we quickly got ready and I finally got to wear my beautiful gown for the first time. The only downside was, was that I had no choice but to wear heels with it which makes me taller than him but that's something we'll just have to get used to ha! We got to the boat just in time for boarding and it wasn't exactly what I had expected, I guess I didn't really realize how many people they cram in there and I was kind of bummed we didn't get a window seat but we were still close enough. The food was really good, that was one of the things I was nervous about because a lot of the reviews say their food was just bland but I thought it was delicious. After we had an appetizer, an entree, and dessert with champagne we went and stood outside to look at all the pretty mansions while we were riding through Lake Oswego and just checking everything out (though it was dark). It was so relaxing and romantic, I hadn't been on a boat in forever. I think the best part of that whole experience was the fact that my buddy loved it, and that I simply got to spend it with him. 
I'd say it was by far my favourite Valentines date ever (even though I've only ever spent it with someone once before). It was just like I had envisioned it and the fact that I got to live it without any problems made it all the more amazing.